Whenever my Mistress comes to visit me, I am super excited. When I am not in her arms, or serving her, I feel suffocated, alone, soulless. I don’t feel like I have a purpose and often times I fall into a small depression. I don’t know why this is. Maybe sub drop? So when she is here, I am more than eager to submit. For now it has been a very sensual d/s relationship. We dont have a lot of privacy yet to do hardcore scenes, but I have what I need currently.
I am often invisible. No one in my daily life talks to me really, or does anything with me. I once fell sleep in the bath tub for four hours, and no one knew. No one checked on me, no one even knew I was gone. It really breaks my heart, and it mades me angry, and sad, and lonely. So of course when Mistress comes, it is the best times of my life. Even if we dont do anything. I feel at peace with my Mistress. Sure I get embarassed sometimes, because of my past trauma, or insecurities, but regardless when I am serving my Mistress, I feel a great peace come over me. Like I have found home, where I belong.
My Mistress is amazing too. If I have pain, because I have health issues, she will stop, and make sure I m alright. If I am hurting to much, she wont do anything at all. Though I am horny all the damn time, and I can cum like a camel carries water. Forever and a day it seems. Sometimes I do reach a point where my body is like…Nope, time to recoop. Mistress is understanding, and so she listens to my body, and tries her hardest to make sure that her little slut is healthy as can be, and not in so much pain.
Though despite the pain I am in constantly, I am just glad I can serve my Mistress. Granted I HATE chores, but for some reason I love doing them for my Mistress. Like her laundry. It makes me aroused to do it. This is not the best thing I cherish doing. I love to rub her back, and her feet. It hurts my hands a lot, and I cant do it for very long, but the last time I did it. She fell asleep. It made my slave belly ignite, to know I made her feel so good she passed out. Mistress really needed it.
Now I am crying again. Writing about this makes me miss her so much more. She will be here in two days, to stay for two days, but these two days are agonizing.