Real love

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Love is not a simple feat nor something simply said. Love takes courage and to be honest a hell of a lot of resilience.

Today one of my great teachers and inspirations Maya Angelou passed away. She was a woman who has shared some of my favorite wisdom. And what she said touched home:

“Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more
time.” – Maya Angelou

It’s easy to love when love is convenient, but what happens when your heart breaks? When you betray or when you are betrayed? What happens when your past creeps up behind you suddenly?

Life is not black and white and love most definitely resides in the shades and colors and the ins and outs and ups and downs.

Love is a warriors sport. I always considered myself a loving person but what I realized was most of the time I loved to receive love, not to give for the sake of giving. I gave to get.

I have recently discovered that true love resides in giving for the sake of giving. In other words, giving without an agenda. That is easier said that done though. It is essential for us to recognize that just like any art it takes a discipline to create it.

Love is an art that requires the discipline to continuously look at oneself and see where you lack, the more you love yourself the more you can love others and be loved by others.

How do we learn this? By loving and losing, by loving and thriving, by loving again and again.

Choose love always. @CosmicChristine (Click to Tweet!)

Today, take a peek behind your walls and see where you feel love still needs to go. What parts of yourself are you not yet loving? Where are you giving to get? Get clear, get honest. In revealing your truth however it hurts – it’s key to deepening your discipline to love better and love fiercer.

Next, choose to love again. Choose to love yourself again and deeper. Choose to love others again and deeper. And choose to allow yourself to be loved again and deeper.

Dive deep, choose love. Go.

Christine

Christine Gutierrez is a psychotherapist, advice columnist, speaker, author, poet, and founder of CosmicLife.com, an online hub that features psychologically-savvy and soulful advice, articles, videos, private consultations, workshops, retreats (both live and virtual), radio appearances, and television projects. “Ancient wisdom with a modern twist” is the motto. She has been featured in TimeOut NY Magazine, Latina Magazine as “The Future 15: The Healer,” Yahoo Health, Ebony Magazine, Cosmopolitan for Latinas, The Conversation, Cosmopolitan Magazine, Ricki Lake, Lifetime TV, and more. You can also follow Christine on Twitter and Facebook.

Article taken from:
http://www.positivelypositive.com/2014/06/09/what-im-learning-about-love/

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So when I saw this I wondered. Have I loved anyone just to love them, or did I love to get love back? It is hard to sit down all day to think about my past relationships and I can honestly say:

Most of my relationships I did love, only to get love. To feel the joy of it, the highs of it, and damn it to feel wanted and needed. Of course I thought I gave my love back just as much, but I think that because it wasnt selfless love. That deep down unconditional love where you love with all of your soul, and expect nothing in return then that is why those relationships didnt last?

I know things change, people change over time. I can admit there has been only a very small select few that I have loved unconditionally and never expected anything in return. This article has truly been an eye opener for me.

My heart goes out to the woman, who lost a dear friend, but I am truly thankful for the insight. I will from now on, always look at my future relationships to see if I am selfish with my love, or selfless!

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